NOTE: If you haven’t been following this from the beginning, and if you want to know the full sequence of events, start with the introduction. Click on Archives on the right.
Albrecht and I are sheltering in the Safeway’s protected entrance, under an extension of the gently sloping concrete arch of the old-fashioned roof.
I put my tote bag down hoping the lemon gelato and frozen peas don’t spoil in the heat. We wait for the latest cloudburst to pass.
“Hey Fred!”
Albrecht is eating a banana, having twisted the black stalk from the bunch he just bought.
“Did you hear about the big move?”
He strips some peel down around his fingers.
“No, Albrecht, what’s that?”
“It’s all-over social media, man. Where have you been?”
“I am taking a summer break from social media.”
“That’s reality. I keep having to bring you up to date, my friend. Am I the only source of truth and optimism in your life?”
“Far from it, buddy. So clue me in.”
“Macadamia is moving the White House to Las Vegas. It will be called White House West. It is another stroke of genius!”
“It is? What about the original, here on Pennsylvania Avenue?”
“It will reopen as a museum and church.”
“A church? That’s government property. It would be unconstitutional. Besides, what denomination will it serve?”
“It will be interdenominational. Featuring the ‘ten commandments’ movie. You know, the one with Charlton Heston. A big strong white man leading his people out of slavery under the pharoahs, just like Macadamia leading America out of socialism and Godless communism.”
“I see, the church of commercial success.”
“Yeah. Okay Fred, the movie theater is called the Temple of Truth, to be situated in the new ball room.”
“Well, Albrecht, this really is a big deal, and a bit of a nightmare!”
“Our leader, well, he is our prophet really! He is bringing us up to date. Forget the Constitution, that’s eighteenth century. We left that behind, long ago. We just have to grow up! We must let go of the past! We live in the twenty-first century world of entertainment, and happiness!”
“Albrecht, we have already left parts of the Constitution behind. The present Congress has given up its duty and power as a legislature and the executive has gained far too much power. Anyway, you are missing something.”
“What’s that, Fred?”
“How is all this funded without a Congressional appropriation?”
“President Macadamia is raising the funds privately and getting help from government departments.”
“And the casinos I should think.”
“Yeah, there’s the possibility of a few good deals there!”
“Has Congress been consulted at all?”
“No, the President and the Speaker have had long and detailed discussions, though.”
“I’ll bet they have, but the legislators need a look in, don’t you think?”
“Well, not until its done. You know, they will approve the final move and all that.”
“Suppose they don’t approve?”
“A majority will approve because they are loyal to the President and are anticommunists, and their seats depend on it!”
“Of course, that unfortunately, seems possible, if not likely.”
“Anyway Fred, listen to this.” Albrecht starts reading from his phone.
“A fifty-story, star shaped building symbolizing the fifty states, is now under construction in Las Vegas. It will be known as ‘Whitehouse West’.”
Each state will have a floor for offices coordinating with the President on policy and other matters.
Whitehouse West will have its own broadcast and media studios staffed by loyal media personalities to keep a Happy America entertained and up to date on movies, and celebrities. There will be lots of game shows, the best entertainers from the casinos, and sports will be covered 24/7. Hourly news shows will remind us of the dangers facing our great country and the magnificent accomplishments of our very own American genius, Macadamia.”
“That sounds like Maoist propaganda! Don’t tell me he is going to distribute a little red book!”
“Who reads books, Fred? No way, this is entertainment.”
“You mean we are going to have a government owned and run by media companies? No way! How could any conservative support that?”
“Fred, we aren’t pursuing happiness anymore, like it says in the Declaration of Independence. We are past that. We have caught up with happiness, and we live in happiness 24/7!”
“Albrecht, that isn’t happiness. It is a distraction, that will probably lead to mental illness.”
“So, what else is new? Distraction and mental illness have been a big part of politics since the old Greeks and Romans. We have just updated the techniques.”
“I can’t see this working out.”
“You know what else? They are planning for two hundred podcast booths for young aspiring influencers to come in, get some guidance, and get the word out!”
“Suppose there are some heretics among them?”
“They won’t last, because that would be disloyal. Look, a loyal Congress will support the program.”
“Loyal to whom? What about the folks in their districts?”
“All those happy God-fearing folks are fully represented.”
“Come on, Albrecht. This is just a fantasy, an illusion! What’s all this about communists? That scare was over when the Soviet Union fell.”
“It isn’t over in the minds of loyal Americans. There’s still a minority of progressives and college professors and, folks like that, who won’t get it, but we are marginalizing them now. That anticommunist message keeps up well-established fears, by three generations of reinforcement. It is subtle but effective messaging, calling on our collective memories of a time when America was a great and powerful force for all that’s good in the world.”
“Yes, fear, I get that. Stop it, Albrecht. Get real!”
“This is reality, Fred. I keep reminding you of that. Congress is united by one thing: Keeping their seats. Of course, they also need their liberty and tax cuts for their contributors. It is mainly about wealth. Don’t forget, Fred, this thing is privately funded and managed by the best professionals in the business, not by congressional appropriations and layers of government bureaucrats.”
“Some in Congress are better than that and try to represent constituents who are not so well off, or homeless, or sick and in debt over their heads.”
“Ah, Fred, don’t be such a downer. Don’t keep criticizing. We are imperfect humans. When has there not been poverty and discontent?”
A gust of wind drives rain and hail into our protected area by the shopping carts. We step back along with other shoppers who are waiting for a break in the weather or a ride.
“Fred this is going to be a seamless combination of news, politics, entertainment, and joy for loyal Americans!”
“The thing is, Albrecht, we owe our loyalty to the Constitution not to a media blitz.”
“That’s just backward looking, Fred. Get out of the past and join the joyful party! Anyway, how many people do you think really know what is in the Constitution?”
“Not enough.”
A woman behind us with wet hair sticking to her forehead steps forward, looking at me.
“Civics haven’t been taught in most of our schools for a generation. That’s how we are getting this. That is why people don’t understand their own country’s government!”
“Lady, they understand all they need to understand.”
“I couldn’t disagree more! I don’t want to get into a pointless dispute, either.”
She steps away.
Lightening fills the parking lot as if for a flash photograph.
“Hey lady, what’s your name? I am Albrecht, this is my buddy, Fred. Come talk with us.”
She makes her way to the other end of the portico without turning her head.
“Come back! Fred, here, may agree with you!”
She doesn’t respond.
Albrecht throws his banana peel in the trash can by the door.
“See Fred, these progressives are so stuck in the past, it’s like they are cemented there.”
“No, Albrecht, not the past, the present! She doesn’t like the direction you are indicating.”
“Well, we need to talk!”
“We are talking.”
Abrecht starts reading about Whitehouse West from his phone again.
Whitehouse West will provide accommodation for cabinet officers and white house staff, who will have opportunities to play in the first-floor casino with free chips, called loyalty chips. They look like silver dollars, showing the president’s head, and the motto, ‘You too can Get Rich’. They can also trade stocks in the exchange next door, as soon as they get a hot tip from ongoing legislation. This operation will be managed by a firm affiliated with Macadamia’s enterprises known as U.S. Wealth-Action & Profit Inc.”
“That’s all illegal and unethical. Those are not just opportunities; it is outright corruption!”
“You know what they say about Vegas!”
“What are they saying?”
“What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.”
“Albrecht, what is happening to you?”
“I am just supporting the most powerful mind in history!”
“Well, I don’t think you could possibly believe all the guff, Albrecht! I know you well enough to think you are not that gullible.”
“I am just getting rich, Fred. Spreading the message. That’s what our country is all about. I am telling you, Fred, I can point toward plenty of opportunities out there for a guy like you, whose family’s British roots have been in our sacred soil since the seventeenth century.”
