NOTE: If you haven’t been following this from the beginning, and if you want to know the full sequence of events, start with the introduction. Click on Archives on the right.
The Cavendish Pie Shop is named in memory of Henry Cavendish, who, among other things, is credited with discovering hydrogen in 1766. Now known as The Pie Shop, after joining the gas station as part of Jake Trip’s growing local business group.
Franz opens the door for me without difficulty. Franz and I arrive at the same time and just before Albrecht.
“Hi Fred, I am Franz Banninck Cocq, commander of the Fauxmont Militia.”
“I recognized you but don’t believe we have met.”
“Yeah, I have seen you around too and heard about you from Albrecht.”
“Well, that may or may not be to the good.”
“He wants us to get together.”
“Well, here we are!”
Albrecht Intaglio opens the door with a forceful pull and the door closer grinds.
He turns and looks up at it.
“Somebody better lubricate that thing!”
He waves us toward a table.
“Fred! Glad you could make it on such short notice. Let’s sit here. I realize my text was kind of last minute.”
“It was not too late, Albrecht, what is this all about?”
“I want to introduce Franz, for a start.”
“We have just introduced ourselves.”
“Thanks Franz, I knew you guys would get along.”
Albrecht insists on picking up the tab for Franz and me.
“What are you having Fred?”
“Darjeeling tea please.”
Franz and I sit down in the empty café while Albrecht fetches from the barista.
“So, Fred, are you helping Albrecht around Fauxmont?”
“Probably not. We do chat once-in-a-while and often disagree.”
“Well, I don’t agree with him on everything either.”
Franz pulls out a chair for Albrecht who has his hands full. Franz’s thin straw-color hair flies out from the sides of his bald head, as if he were spinning.
“As I was saying to Fred the other day, Franz, TV is what it’s all about.”
“And social media, Albrecht. Don’t forget social media. You can mainline a political message past the brain direct to the gut.”
“What do you mean Franz?”
“Fred, I mean social media is reality.”
“But it isn’t. It is just flickering images on a phone.”
“Don’t you believe it! It feels real to the target audience. As real as you and me sitting here.”
“It does?”
Albrecht makes the time out sign with his hands.
“Sure, think of a commercial, Fred.”
“Okay, I am thinking of one and I can’t wait for it to be over.”
“You remember all the enthusiasm, the upbeat music, and happy smiling faces? They are designed to make you associate your good feelings with the product!”
“That makes sense.”
“When Americans feel good, America is Great Again!”
“Just a minute! If I feel good, it means no more than that, I feel good.”
“In your case, maybe so.”
“Why should people watch tv to feel good, anyway?”
“Fred, you know! Life is tough, jobs are hard, you know that!”
“Well Mac has a Christian following, they have a bigger answer, don’t they?”
“Sure, prayer and church and all that, but it doesn’t get people worked up and into the voting booths, and stores, pumping up our prosperity.”
“No, for believers, faith is the issue.”
“That’s for saints, we are about voters.”
“Can’t people be both?”
“I don’t know any voting saints, Fred.”
“People who think and reflect aren’t saints, they are just people.”
Franz tries to smooth his hair back, but it bounces out again.
“Fred, my aunt used to pray all the time. She was broke. Her husband was killed in an accident back in Holland. It wasn’t until Dad brought her over here that she could eat regularly.”
“Nothing wrong with that, Franz.”
“See, you think too much, Fred, you have got to get tuned in to the associations.”
“Too much of this political stuff is made to scare me.”
Albrecht brandishes his Macadamia hat in his left hand and swigs his coffee with his right.
“Fear brings in the votes, Fred.”
“Fear is mindless!”
“That’s the point. We don’t want people scratching their heads. Got to keep them scared and angry, and impulsive.”
“Well, that formula has been used for a long time.”
“We are heading for a permanent majority!”
“Albrecht, that is just the sort of thing which our system of checks and balances is designed to counter.”
“Guys, that gridlock has held us back ever since Roosevelt and the Depression.”
“Those tensions have held us together, Albrecht.”
“Macadamia is a strong leader, and he takes strong measures. There are no checks on him. He is upsetting the balance!”
Albrecht throws his right fist in the air.
“The courts tell us much of it is illegal.”
“The courts don’t matter, that’s just legal opinion.”
“Legally binding, though.”
“The Supreme court will take care of that, Franz.”
Franz looks into his coffee in its plastic cup. “Possibly, but I think they will rubber stamp it.”
“You bet, Mac had the lucky opportunity to appoint loyal judges.”
“Mac is losing some of his luster, you know.”
“Fred, once we flood these Democrat cities with troops and get it all on tv, and get these invaders off the streets, Mac will gain huge support.”
“What invaders?”
Albrecht waves to Rank Majors in the parking lot, headed for the Safeway.
“The rapists and dope addicts that have been flooding in during the last administration.”
“Albrecht, have you noticed the H Bar has lost a lot of staff?”
“That’s right, Fred! They can hire Americans now.”
“Albrecht, have you noticed Mr. Hoffmann had to hire a relative? There were no other applicants.”
“Good, that’s one more American who has a job!”
“Those employees weren’t criminals!”
“They were here unlawfully!”
Franz now does the time-out sign with his hands. “It is just a misdemeanor the first time you come across.”
“It is a problem whenever they come, Franz.”
“Mr. Hoffmann makes sure his employees’ status is okay. He can prove it. He sponsored them. You are talking about rapists and so on.”
“Fred, how do you know those people weren’t dealing on the side?”
“Well, Albrecht, how do you know they were?”
“I don’t know for sure, but those people are all in it, one way or another.”
“Those people?”
Franz shakes his head and takes a sip of coffee.
“Due process, Albrecht, due process.”
“We don’t have time for that, Franz.”
“Too many undocumented people are getting rounded up without it.”
“They are all here illegally, Fred, and we enforce the law.”
“Look I am a law-and-order guy, okay? They are all suspects until due process is done.”
“Franz, like I said, that will take forever!”
“What’s the hurry, Albrecht?”
“We need urgency to keep the voters focused.”
“You mean distracted, Albrecht!”
“Fred, it’s part of our Militia’s program to pick up any of them around here.”
“I see, and then what?”
Franz rolls his eyes. “That’s the question, Fred, and I don’t like it.”
“Franz, let me tell Fred something: the biggest distraction of all, is the Liberal idea that the government is the answer.”
“The answer to what, Albrecht?”
“To their endless empathy.”
“Macadamia is preaching hatred, which seems like a poor alternative to me.”
“We all need someone to hate, Fred.”
‘We do?”
“Well, maybe you don’t but hatred is out there, and we have it.”
“Why?
“Because it works!”
“A good deal of history bears that out alright.”
“Okay, so you get it, Fred. President Macadamia keeps up the daily pace as the only answer to all our nation’s problems!”
“For one thing, he hasn’t got the answer to our deficit problem. The cost of that debt is now greater than the defense budget. Mac is just adding to it.”
“Nobody knows that! It is irrelevant.”
Two women in sports gear come in and distract us. I break into our brief silence.
“Economically, it is both relevant and dangerous.”
“That’s just the short term. In a few years we will all be rich!”
“Yeah, voters in those blue states will be clamoring for thier share!”
“You know, Albrecht, there are cities in blue states with serious crime problems?”
“Sure, but they will soon get the message.”
“I am opposed to using troops anywhere.”
“No need, Franz, see, we have support of the voters there.”
“What difference does that make, Abrecht?”
“It means they will take care of the situation themselves. They support Macadamia’s program.”
“What do you think his program is?”
“Fred, we are going to bring back white American culture, patriotism, Christianity, family and community, you know!”
“That’s not just white America.”
“We created it, right here. It didn’t happen anywhere else.”
“No Albrecht, Christianity aside, culture, patriotism, family and community are universal values.”
“Not among American liberals!”
“Look, Fred, my grandparents came over from Holland in 1914, to escape the war. They didn’t work their butts off so their adopted country could be taken over by folks from South of the Border and Africa and God knows where.”
“They aren’t taking over, Franz!”
“Have you checked the demographics lately? We white people will be a minority in our own country by about 2044!”
“So, what’s the problem?”
Albrecht knocks on the table as if he were at a door.
“The problem is we are losing ground to inferior races.”
“No, no, Albrecht, cultural diversity is a strength, not a problem.”
Albrecht swigs the last of his cold coffee.
“We need voters to associate those people with trouble. To keep them pumped up at the polls.”
“That is both dangerous and immoral!”
“Fred, there you go with your empathy again!”
“I believe in the melting pot!”
“Well, Fred, things are heating up alright.”
“Damn right Franz, see where all this empathy has got us? We must take our country back!”
“Okay Albrecht, but it must be done within the law!”
“Franz, Macadamia and our Congress can always change the laws!”
Franz and Albrecht are laughing and do a high five.
The door swings shut after a family come in with children.
The door closer fails and instead of closing, it thumps against a vacant chair too close to the entrance, leaving the store wide open.
A sudden influx of customers form a line out the doorway.
